The sixteenth annual Narey's Toepoker Team Of The Year (part 1)

I've done this every year for sixteen years, and to be honest it's never felt more like a chore. When you don't have any skin in the game - that's six years Caley Thistle have been stuck in the Championship - it becomes even harder to be motivated by watching Celtic and Rangers pump everybody. It's also more difficult than ever to pick players from other clubs for this XI, because I'm very close to crossing the 'taking the p***' line' by doing so. Still, I've tried my best.

For historical record, the previous fifteen lineups:

2007/08: Allan McGregor (Rangers), Alan Hutton (Rangers), Carlos Cuellar (Rangers), Lee Wilkie (Dundee United), Lee Naylor (Celtic), Barry Robson (Celtic), Stephen Hughes (Motherwell), Barry Ferguson (Rangers), Aiden McGeady (Celtic), Scott McDonald (Celtic), Steven Fletcher (Hibernian)

2008/09: Lukasz Zaluska (Dundee United), Andreas Hinkel (Celtic), Gary Caldwell (Celtic), Lee Wilkie (Dundee United), Sasa Papac (Rangers), Scott Brown (Celtic), Bruno Aguiar (Hearts), Pedro Mendes (Rangers), Andrew Driver (Hearts), Scott McDonald (Celtic), Kris Boyd (Rangers)

2009/10: John Ruddy (Motherwell), Steven Whittaker (Rangers), David Weir (Rangers), Andy Webster (Dundee United), Sasa Papac (Rangers), Steven Davis (Rangers), Morgaro Gomis (Dundee United), James McArthur (Hamilton), Anthony Stokes (Hibernian), Kris Boyd (Rangers), David Goodwillie (Dundee United)

2010/11: Marian Kello (Hearts), Steven Whittaker (Rangers), Daniel Majstorovic (Celtic), Michael Duberry (St. Johnstone), Emilio Izaguirre (Celtic), Steven Naismith (Rangers), Beram Kayal (Celtic), Alexei Eremenko (Kilmarnock), David Templeton (Hearts), Nikica Jelavic (Rangers), David Goodwillie (Dundee United)

2011/12: Cammy Bell (Kilmarnock), Adam Matthews (Celtic), Carlos Bocanegra (Rangers), Charlie Mulgrew (Celtic), Paul Dixon (Dundee United), James Forrest (Celtic), Victor Wanyama (Celtic), Ian Black (Hearts), Dean Shiels (Kilmarnock), Jon Daly (Dundee United), Gary Hooper (Celtic)

2012/13: Fraser Forster (Celtic), Mihael Kovacevic (Ross County), Gary Warren (Inverness CT), Mark Reynolds (Aberdeen), Stevie Hammell (Motherwell), Victor Wanyama (Celtic), Nicky Law (Motherwell), Murray Davidson (St. Johnstone), Leigh Griffiths (Hibernian), Michael Higdon (Motherwell), Billy Mckay (Inverness CT) 

2013/14: Jamie MacDonald (Hearts), Dave Mackay (St. Johnstone), Virgil Van Dijk (Celtic), Mark Reynolds (Aberdeen), Andrew Robertson (Dundee United), Scott Brown (Celtic), Stuart Armstrong (Dundee United), Peter Pawlett (Aberdeen), Kris Commons (Celtic), Kris Boyd (Kilmarnock), Stevie May (St. Johnstone)

2014/15: Craig Gordon (Celtic), Shay Logan (Aberdeen), Virgil Van Dijk (Celtic), Jason Denayer (Celtic), Graeme Shinnie (Inverness CT), Ryan Jack (Aberdeen), Greg Tansey (Inverness CT), Greg Stewart (Dundee), Stefan Johansen (Celtic), Gary Mackay-Steven (Dundee United/Celtic), Adam Rooney (Aberdeen)

2015/16: Jamie MacDonald (Kilmarnock), Callum Paterson (Hearts), Igor Rossi (Hearts), Andrew Davies (Ross County), Graeme Shinnie (Aberdeen), Nir Bitton (Celtic), Jackson Irvine (Ross County), Jonny Hayes (Aberdeen), Kenny McLean (Aberdeen), Marvin Johnson (Motherwell), Leigh Griffiths (Celtic)

2016/17: Joe Lewis (Aberdeen), Callum Paterson (Hearts), Jozo Simunovic (Celtic), Joe Shaughnessy (St. Johnstone), Kieran Tierney (Celtic), Jonny Hayes (Aberdeen), Stuart Armstrong (Celtic), Adam Barton (Partick Thistle), Scott Sinclair (Celtic), Moussa Dembele (Celtic), Liam Boyce (Ross County)

2017/18: Jon McLaughlin (Hearts), James Tavernier (Rangers), Scott McKenna (Aberdeen), Christophe Berra (Hearts), Kieran Tierney (Celtic), Scott Brown (Celtic), Dylan McGeouch (Hibernian), John McGinn (Hibernian), James Forrest (Celtic), Daniel Candeias (Rangers), Kris Boyd (Kilmarnock)

2018/19: Allan McGregor (Rangers), James Tavernier (Rangers), Kristoffer Ajer (Celtic), Craig Halkett (Livingston), Kieran Tierney (Celtic), Callum McGregor (Celtic), David Turnbull (Motherwell), James Forrest (Celtic), Ryan Christie (Celtic), Ryan Kent (Rangers), Alfredo Morelos (Rangers)

2019/20: Mark Gillespie (Motherwell), James Tavernier (Rangers), Kristoffer Ajer (Celtic), Jon Guthrie (Livingston), Borna Barisic (Rangers), James Forrest (Celtic), Callum McGregor (Celtic), Ali McCann (St. Johnstone), Niall McGinn (Aberdeen), Odsonne Edouard (Celtic), Alfredo Morelos (Rangers)

2020/21: Benjamin Siegrist (Dundee United), James Tavernier (Rangers), Conor Goldson (Rangers), Jason Kerr (St. Johnstone), Borna Barisic (Rangers), Steven Davis (Rangers), Ali McCann (St. Johnstone), Ryan Kent (Rangers), David Turnbull (Celtic), Martin Boyle (Hibernian), Odsonne Edouard (Celtic)

2021/22: Craig Gordon (Hearts), James Tavernier (Rangers), Cameron Carter-Vickers (Celtic), Ryan Edwards (Dundee United), Stephen Kingsley (Hearts), Callum McGregor (Celtic), Joe Aribo (Rangers), Regan Charles-Cook (Ross County), Barrie McKay (Hearts), Jota (Celtic), Alfredo Morelos (Rangers)

Onto this year's vintage. As per tradition, we'll start with the goalkeeper and back four. It's always a back four...

GOALKEEPER: TREVOR CARSON (ST. MIRREN)

Honourable mentions: Joe Hart (Celtic), Zander Clark (Heart of Midlothian)

Carson's previous four seasons? Three as Motherwell's backup keeper and one as Dundee United's backup keeper (before moving to Morecambe on loan). So yeah, I think we were all a bit surprised that the Northern Irish veteran has suddenly become amazing. Unquestionably the 35 year old has had the best season of his career.

Yes, Hart is surely the best goalkeeper in Scotland but its hard to judge the quality of a player who faces about one shot on target every three months. Clark's move to Hearts looked strange to me - was being number two to Craig Gordon for a year or two that good a career move? - but Gordon's injury has given him an opportunity that he has grabbed with both hands.

RIGHT-BACK: JAMES TAVERNIER (RANGERS)

Honourable mentions: Nicky Devlin (Livingston), Ryan Strain (St. Mirren)

That's just the six straight years that the Rangers captain has been in my Team of the Year, though this season it's as much down to a lack of competition as anything else. Still, sixteen league goals is a heck of a return and whilst Rangers have a few problems to deal with this summer he isn't one of them.

Devlin's consistency for Livingston has earned him a summer move to Aberdeen. Strain has had an excellent first season in Scotland, not least because of his skill with a dead ball. I'm still insisting that players have to have played at least 19 league games to qualify for this, so that rules out both Alistair Johnston and Max Johnston. Don't @ me...

LEFT-BACK: GREG TAYLOR (CELTIC)

Honourable mentions: Borna Barisic (Rangers), Alex Cochrane (Heart of Midlothian)

Taylor has just been so consistent. His development under Ange has been far beyond what I expected and he held off the challenge of new signing Alexandro Bernabei with ease.

Barisic is probably beginning to decline but is still better than most left-backs in this league, which isn't saying much. Cochrane was superb in the first half of the season but his form has dipped along with his teammates in 2023.

CENTRE-BACKS: CAMERON CARTER-VICKERS (CELTIC), CONOR GOLDSON (RANGERS)

Honourable mentions: Carl Starfelt (Celtic), Jack Fitzwater (Livingston), Kye Rowles (Heart of Midlothian), Ryan Porteous (Hibernian)

Carter-Vickers is far too good for this poxy league and Celtic will be hoping it takes him a few more seasons to realise that. It's remarkable just how much CCV and Goldson are missed when they're not there; the drop off to the backups at Rangers and Celtic is steep indeed.

If I'd been feeling more reckless I'd have picked Porteous on the back of his performances before he signed for Watford in January. Rowles was amazing before the World Cup but mediocre after. Starfelt was solid except when CCV wasn't alongside him (coincidence?). Fitzwater is the next Livi player who will go on to better things this summer. Oh, and Mattie Pollock just didn't play enough matches for consideration, but he was very good for Aberdeen.

The midfield and attack will appear at some point. Eventually.

Lawrie Spence has whinged about Scottish football on Narey's Toepoker since September 2007. He has a life outside this blog. Honestly.

Worst signings of the 2022/23 Premiership season (part 2)

Top ten time! Here's the countdown from 25 to 11, if you missed it.

10. JOHN SOUTTAR (RANGERS)

There are three certainties in life: death, taxes and John Souttar getting injured. Inevitably Soapy got crocked on his Rangers debut and was missing for eight months; giving him an Old Firm game at Celtic Park for his first start felt like a disaster waiting to happen and so it proved with the centre-back gifting a goal with a dreadful backpass. Rangers need a reliable partner for Connor Goldson; Souttar is unlikely to be that player.

9. DEJI SOTONA (KILMARNOCK)

Even Killie fans may not recognise the name; the Irish striker joined on loan from Nice, made a couple of sub appearances and was never seen again. It was all rather reminiscent of the sort of player Lee Clark signed for the club back in the day. Sotona is now turning out for Burnley's under 23s.

8. MOMODOU BOJANG (HIBERNIAN)

I wouldn't believe there was a football club called Rainbow FC had Hibs not signed Bojang on loan from them. The Gambian forward was a low-risk, high-reward signing but was clearly out of his depth and ending his loan spell early in January was best for everyone.

7. PHILLIP CANCAR (LIVINGSTON)

Australian Cancar actually started for Livi on opening day against Rangers, only to be hauled off after a torrid 34 minutes before he got an inevitable second yellow card. He made a couple of sub appearances after that before disappearing off the radar from September onward. In January he returned permanently to Oz, six months into a two year deal with an optional third year.

6. JOSH MORRIS (MOTHERWELL)

One of Graham Alexander's last signings, it's not clear whether it's injury that has kept him out of action since the autumn or whether he is just unwanted at Motherwell. Regardless, he clearly wasn't rated by Stevie Hammell and isn't being missed by Stuart Kettlewell; Morris only registered on Scottish football's radar for somehow not getting sent off after poleaxing Celtic's Carl Starfelt back in October.

5. MARK BIRIGHITTI (DUNDEE UNITED)

Birighitti forced his way out of Central Coast Mariners to "chase my dreams", which invites the obvious question "In Dundee?!". He has improved in the last month or so...not that this would be hard, given the extraordinary number of individual errors he has made over the course of the season, whether it be flapping at crosses or parrying shots straight to strikers or most infamously being slide-tackled by Stevie May for a St. Johnstone winner. But with United having loaned away backup Carljohan Eriksson and having only the equally hapless (at least in his one appearance in Dingwall) Jack Newman as competition, the Australian is still between the sticks. And don't forget that United actually paid money to sign him...

4. RABBI MATONDO (RANGERS)

Four years ago Matondo was so highly rated that Schalke paid £11m to sign him from Manchester City. Rangers paid just a fraction of that to sign him last summer but he hasn't even looked worth that. An injury in the new year hasn't helped but the Welsh international has struggled to justify anything more than a succession of late appearances off the bench. The most damning thing one can say is that Scott Wright is usually preferred to him.

3. JAYDEN RICHARDSON (ABERDEEN)

On paper, the young Nottingham Forest right-back looked like a good signing with plenty of potential and the Dons paid £300,000 for him. Unfortunately he was following in the footsteps of Calvin Ramsey, but even if expectations had been low Richardson would have failed miserably to meet them. By the autumn Jim Goodwin was already playing centre-backs and midfielders (Matty Kennedy!) ahead of Richardson on the right side of the defence and he's made one start and one substitutes appearance since November. He is under contract for another two years, by the way.

2. HARRY MCKIRDY (HIBERNIAN)

If you're going to insist on a pink mohican then you really need to be pretty special. McKirdy...isn't. It didn't help that within two months of moving north he was suggesting on social media that he wished he hadn't. And then having kept his head down for months and got himself back into the first team picture at last he mouthed off on Instagram last week about being stuck on the subs bench. He still hasn't scored a single goal for Hibs (he managed two for Swindon in August before moving north).

1. ANTHONY STEWART (ABERDEEN)

Making a new signing club captain straightaway is a bold move. Partly because of this - and partly because of his dreadful performances and the dreadful performances of his fellow defenders - Stewart became synonymous with Aberdeen's struggles under Jim Goodwin. It doesn't help his cause that Barry Robson's first act on replacing Goodwin was to punt Stewart out on loan to MK Dons and since then Aberdeen have been pretty much rock solid at the back. What really did for Stewart though was the League Cup Semi Final; beforehand he did a crazy press conference where he discussed how he thought Antonio Colak was better than Alfredo Morelos, and then in the match itself he got himself sent off right at the end of normal time with a lunatic hack on Fashion Sakala. The Dons had no hope of getting through extra time a man down and there was no way back for him; within two and a half weeks both boss and skipper were out. Still, he has a year on his contract left to come back too...

Lawrie Spence has whinged about Scottish football on Narey's Toepoker since September 2007. He has a life outside this blog. Honestly.