It's got so bad that I missed my usual Monday night seven-a-side to go to Caley Thistle's first pre-season game against local Highland League side Clachnacuddin, played at their Grant Street Park, a ground which makes prisoner-of-war camps seem homely and welcoming.
It's got so bad that I've started recording the Copa America and watching the games in the morning using the fast forward button.
It's got so bad that I'm checking the Sky Sports Transfer Centre ticker multiple times a day, looking for any nugget of transfer news that isn't about Alexis Sanchez or bloody Cesc Fabregas.
Ladies and gentlemen, these summers without World Cups and European Championships are hell.
All right, I exaggerate. They are not hell. Hell would be an eternity spent listening to a neverending duet between Kate Bush and Celine Dion, whilst sitting on a spike, and in the company of a rather unpleasant, and frankly psychotic, girl called Louise who was in my class at University. It's where I'm going if it turns out I was wrong to agree with Richard Dawkins' views on the world.
But they are not pleasant. I try to use other sports to compensate; Super Rugby, Wimbledon tennis, the Tour de France. But it's not the same, nor is it remotely close.
I might be coping better if there was some vaguely interesting happenings north of the border. All the news so far has surrounded either decent players leaving the SPL, or transfer dealings which haven't happened.
Examples of the former: Scotland internationals Chris Maguire (Aberdeen to Derby), Craig Conway (Dundee Utd to Cardiff) and Derek Riordan (left Hibs, with no new club yet); Kilmarnock's best players Craig Bryson (to Derby) and Aleksei Eremenko (end of loan), and Inverness' star striker Adam Rooney (to Birmingham).
Examples of the latter? Well, pretty much every deal involving Rangers, whose new owner Craig Whyte has, so far, completely and utterly failed to put his money where his mouth is. It would be one thing if Rangers were missing out on big name, world class players...but in the last few weeks they have been rejected by the aforementioned Conway, who was offered better wages by Cardiff, Crystal Palace midfielder Neil Danns, who was offered better wages (are you seeing a theme here?) by Leicester, and by relatively unknown Israeli forward Tomer Hemed, who chose Real Mallorca instead; in his case I have no idea of the disparity in wages, but I can think of some reasons why Majorca might be preferable to Glasgow, in particular the presence of the sun and the absence of Buckfast.
These are the Bosman signings new manager Ally McCoist has looked to make. When he has offered transfer fees...Rangers' frugality is again holding them back. A £300,000 offer for Hearts' Scotland international full back Lee Wallace could reasonably be described as derisory; protests out of Ibrox that Dundee Utd's £2million valuation of David Goodwillie was excessive and unrealistic were quickly silenced when it became clear that a few English Championship clubs were willing to meet that fee.
And that's the problem this summer. Rangers, certainly, can't (or won't) compete financially with top-half English Championship teams, and the lure of Champions League football doesn't seem to be making up for that. Celtic have, in contrast, managed to get hold of a couple of young players from that division, though I'm unclear as to just how good Kelvin Wilson (signed from Nottingham Forest) and Adam Matthews (from Cardiff) are. But their transfer policy looks, once again, focused on looking for cheap players from unfashionable leagues, to try and emulate the success that they had last year with Izaguirre and Kayal.
And as for the rest? Well, while Rangers are struggling to lure Championship players, the other sides are trying to tempt guys from League One and League Two with the prospect of playing Rangers and Celtic, and getting to play on TV (Motherwell signing Nicky Law from Rotherham, Inverness signing Greg Tansey from Stockport), and there is of course the traditional return of numerous veterans from years in the English leagues – Steven Thompson and Callum Davidson the obvious examples.
But it's just been sooooooooo boring up till now. And I've got to find some way to survive the last three weeks before the action starts on July 23.
Anyone got any bright ideas? And those of you who are tempted to tell me to get a life, please don't. You won't be helping.
L.
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