On two previous occasions, Inverness have been playing at Ibrox when I've been down south watching English Premier League football. On both those occasions, in October 2006 and February 2009, Inverness have won 1-0. On both those occasions, I was informed by multiple text messages from friends and family, physically felt the colour drain from my face, and failed to notice anything that happened in the last five minutes of the game I was at (one of which was a Newcastle-Man Utd match). On both those occasions, several Rangers-supporting friends conveniently switched off their mobiles rather than take a rather smug and slightly abusive call from me.
Imagine my disappointment on Saturday, then, when Caley "only" nabbed a 1-1 draw at Castle Greyskull. Actually, to be honest, my mum texted me to inform me of doo-doo-doo-Eric Odhiambo's equalizer, and I really didn't pay very much attention to the dying seconds at Craven Cottage.
Yes, I was at Craven Cottage in London, for Fulham versus Wigan. Craven Cottage, the first football ground where I have seen fans arrive half an hour late with their shopping. From designer stores. I bet you don't get that at any other football ground - except maybe those rich beggars in the stands at Chelsea?
I didn't go all the way to London for that game. Honest. I'm not that bad (I am aware that many of you who are acquainted with me may or may not believe me on this). I went all the way to London so I could turn to the dark side and watch the, er, other type of football. You know, the American one? So I spent Sunday afternoon at Wembley Stadium. Now, I agree that no building, ever, should cost £798 million. But, well, if you were going to spend more than three quarters of a billion squids on a sports ground, it would look like this.
As I've got older, I can look back at the various football grounds I've visited, and the ones I remember best are the ones which seemed to me like the most incredible thing I've ever seen - even more incredible than a penalty against Celtic at Celtic Park (Josef Stalin was probably less paranoid about the world being out to get him than Celtic are about referees being out to get them). That started, believe it or not, with Easter Road circa 1991, the first match my dad took me to. - it was supposed to be a Dunfermline-Aberdeen game a year earlier, only for the family to get Kirkcaldy belly, and so I missed a four goal haul by Eoin Jess. Instead, at Easter Road, I got a first half hat-trick from Dutch striker Hans Gillhaus, in that bygone era where Aberdeen players made the Holland national team for World Cups. Yes, that really happened. Hard to believe, isn't it? It was also the game where Alex McLeish picked up the knee injury that was to curtail his playing career. I was just seven.
On from there, the next awe-struck moments would have been Ibrox in 1992 (a very dull 0-0 draw between Scotland and Portugal) and Hampden in around 1995 for a humping of the Faroe Islands. Believe it or not, the Tulloch Caledonian Stadium in Inverness never really made me gape in awe.
There was a big gap after that, but more recently, with the opportunities for travelling to games that come with getting older (and having your own transport and income), the next ones to excite me would have been the back-to-back 2006 experiences of Celtic Park for another Scotland-Faroes game - say what you like about Celtic, but the word "cauldron" has never been used so aptly as a metaphor for a stadium - and my first Premiership ground, the Riverside in Middlesbrough, which was also the first time where I have been underneath a giant flag. The next year, St. James' Park in Newcastle was the first ground to give me an acute attack of vertigo...the City of Manchester stadium being the second.
But, at this moment in time, Wembley takes the biscuit. 83,000 people were at that game, and you could believe it. The stands are as vertical as is reasonably possible, keeping the crowd noise in. The views from everywhere seem to be fantastic. And, though my friend insisted the Wembley arch was an architectural necessity, I can't help thinking it was put in the design simply because it would look awesome when lit up at night. And it did.
I know a few folk who have been to the Camp Nou; they assure me that the 99,354 Barcelona stadium is out of this world, especially in combination with the equally exhilarating football usually on display from the home team. But, for the moment, I say Wembley? Wow.
L.
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